bə-lō'nē mō'gəls(n.pl.) 1. A group of drinkers with a shredding problem. 2. The combination of snow, booze, and metal.


The Team Scarf (A Tradition of Generations)

The Boloney Moguls Team Scarf. One of the highest awards a person could receive in the areas of shredding, riding, skiing, boozing, and metaling. Sought after by many. Worn by only the select few.

The styling: One bandanna. Traditionally black, but many colors exist, depending on rank and skill. Proper placement is tied around the lower right leg. Only the right leg. Only the one true leader can sport the bandanna on the left leg. Acceptable apres-ski dress allows for the scarf to be warn in neckerchief mode.

Some prereqs:
  • Ability to shred on no sleep.
  • Well really just be able to do everything on no sleep.
  • Heavy drinking is required
  • Going with that, shredding with a heavy hangover
  • Ability to gobble down tons of chicken, poutine, and ellios.
  • Wear onesies, Starter jackets, and all manner of 80s gear with style
  • Ability to nomad long distances without complaint or need to pee
  • Love of ...And Justice For All at 7:00 A.M.
  • Intense passion for bands Grim Reaper, ManoWar, and Iced Earth
Do you meet these requirements? Do you think you can hack it chump? Tryouts are ongoing and the failure (read: death rate) is high. But if you play your cards right, you might earn the Team Scarf, and all the glory and honor that goes along with it.

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