None More Blacker is Upon Us (Premiere Time)

Here it comes. None More Blacker is officially being premiered for the general public in a stupendous red carpet event at the Dong residence. The first-ever full-length Boloney Moguls feature documents the trials and tribulations of this East Coast shred crew as they tour the world and elsewhere seeking sicky pow pow, and of course, booze.

The premiere will be held on Saturday, June 27th. Expect food, booze, and of course, plenty of metal. There will be a two drink minimum before the screening begins and sobriety will NOT be tolerated. After the initial screening - aiming for between 9 and 10 P.M. - and subsequent tar-and-feathering I will receive for the poor quality of the film, beer pong and binge drinking - as well as NMB on loop - will follow.

Dress code: None more blacker of course with a philosophy of "Dressed to Kill." Interpret however you see fit. Contact me for invite and RSVP, or any other questions.

We are accepting orders of the limited edition DVD which includes the feature as well as the official soundtrack. But they are going fast, so reserve now so you will receive your copy on the launch day.

Here, again, is the initial teaser of this epic. See you Saturday. Stay thirsty my friends.

Snow Monster Strikes Again (News Flash)

In a surprising turn of events, Washington, D.C. has been attacked by the infamous snow monster that has plagued mountains across the continent this winter. Even more shocking is the attack comes in the heat of the early Summer. Washingtonians: Watch out, he's coming for you.

This winter, we saw this mythic beast attack skiers out in Jackson Hole and Snowbird. Then we saw an attack against the gondolas at Whistler. Perhaps this beast now has a taste for metal?

Metal Music (The Soundtrack of Boloney)

Here's a quick summary of some tracks that should be burned into the ear drums of all boloners or those aspiring to boloney.

In the category of "awesome intros" I'd say that has to go to VADER's "This is War." From the start to about 2:30 is an intro so epic, I wish I entered every room with this sort of brutality.


Cool indy metal track by some college kids. Another reminder of how awful I am at guitar:


New Killswitch is on the way. Look for the new album to drop right after NONE MORE BLACKER. This song is epic:

No Plans (Masse Tequila)

So this weekend, Pukey, Dong, and myself got together for a no plans weekend. It was a great success. In a quick wrap-up, there was: a bottle of tequila crushed, a fat wad strewn about, axe throwing, surfing, MTBing, much driving, and the Feast of St. Anthony's thrown in.

Check out Pukey and myself's Picasa pages for full event imagery. But check out some of our sweet videos below:

Me, kicking the crap out of Pukey. She clearly, did not win.


Streetcar Cleary showing how to properly lob an axe in an updated version of the knife game:

Wide World of Shred (Boards, Bikes, and NMB)

In the first installment of the new catch-all post, Wide World of Shred (henceforth WWS), I'll be covering a few topics.

Firstly, I looked at the cams for Jackson Hole. (A storm has since rolled in and obscured the cams) If you told me it was June in Wyoming, I wouldn't believe you. There is no point for that mountain to be closed. I think you could still ride the upper half without even hitting grass.

Second, this may be one of the gnarliest places I've ever seen, and the first time I've ever contemplated driving to Cleveland. Perhaps afterwords a pit stop at that super duper amusement park over there too. Check it out, Ray's Mountain Bike Park. It is supposedly the first indoor MTB park, specifically designed. As the place has taken off and just gotten more and more popular they have continued to expand and allow BMX in there too. Watch some of the videos, the place is pretty mind blowing. Now, they have actually shutdown till Fall for some sort of massive expansion. Oh yea, they've also added a specific room for INDOOR DIRT TRAILS. Nutso. The map itself of the place is insane, 103,000 sq ft of riding.



Thirdly, None More Blacker is soon to be upon us. End of June premiere that will certainly have a None More Blacker dress code as well. Be there. Team riders get a free limited edition copy. All others can pay a nominal fee to take home their very own copy of Boloney Moguls' first full-length production.

Off Topic (Arousing Comics)

Totally off the topic of Boloney and shred. This is just really fun. So Microsoft has this crazy new motion controller in the works for Xbox and it seems pretty magical, called Project Natal (Take a look at the videos on the bottom of the page to get the jist). Check it out here to better understand. Then below is the comic I find so amusing. Of course, Penny Arcade has many other numerous bits worth checking out.

Jealous of the West (Random Updates)

So as the weather continues to become sweltering in the Mid-Atlantic and Long Island heats up, those lucky enough to live in the high elevations out West are still able to have some uber late season shred. I guess at this point it is nearly summer skiing. Pretty cool. Check this video out posted by a dude who is living in SLC and hits some huge lines on parts unknown near Snowbird.



With the heat and sun, time to get busy falling off the mountain bike and surfing.